Introducing....The Yeti

My colon surgery was on a Friday. I finally woke up at 9pm that night crying in pain. Then the next few days I pushed a lovely button intermittently day and nights to follow and in between twilight sleep I would gaze up at the t.v. that was stationed on the National Geographic channel. It was a weekend marathon special about the Himalayans ever allusive creature, the Yeti. It caught my carefree attention. And after three days of watching bits and pieces of the show where the scientist were trying to prove the true existence of this legend, I began to hear the yeti moaning from the vent in my hospital, or was it the patient in the next room over??? I'll never know.

Then I was visited by special ilestomy nurse, Phyllis. She came in my room and taught me all about my new feature and accessory the stoma and the bag. The ideal stoma protrudes out about a half inch and the opening is right in the middle like a bulls eye. But to my disappointment I was not to be blessed with the perfect stoma or opening. As Phyllis examined the stoma she couldn't even find the opening at first. I knew it had to have an opening because stuff was coming out and dumping into the bag. "There it is tuck way low and aiming down. That's okay. We'll make it work. It's just a little shy one."

Then she told me that people name there stomas and I ought to think of a name for mine. One lady named hers Bling. She explained that the stoma gets kind of noisy at times. It's like having a whoopee cushion in my belly for people five feet around all to hear. The sounds only a six year boy laughs out loud about.

I sent John home for the night and I lay in my bed in the dark waiting for my sleeping medicine to kick in and I heard the sounds again. The yeti was calling.

When Phyllis came back the next day to check on me I could officially introduce her to my stoma, the Yeti, because it's a shy one that Yeti. It's true! The Yeti lives. And if you're lucky you might hear it if you come and visit me.


"...we really don't know what we believe or believe in until we're tested...Whether we like it or not our trials and struggles can tend to accelerate our push toward godliness." Sheri Dew, If Life were Easy it wouldn't be Hard